♡ cheryl . 

The ginger whose eyebrows had raised since entering the room had a one track mind,  like a gold fish.  Idly,  her small,  barely there,  steps brought her closer and closer to betty’s bedside.  The vinyl single seater adjacent to the hospital cot had gotten a scoff from Cheryl once already.  As she got a better look,  she could see what looked like permanent butt sweat and coffee stains as well as tears from the weight of visitors passed who had spent the night,  or many nights,  with their loved ones.

Betty’s words echoed in Cheryl’s head like an acoustically-blessed church-given confession:
today?  no.

A figurative veil dropped in front of Cheryl’s face,  separating her from the present moment.  Her vision felt blurred and her chest tight and guarded,  like it should have been already.  JJ knew her better than anyone.  Surely he had noticed the way Cheryl’s eyes had lingered on the blonde for moments too long on many occasions.  Perhaps he hadn’t noticed because he was too busy letting his own gaze wander.  Perhaps the twins were more alike than they could have ever imagined.

Similarity.  Something she and JJ had found to be endearing up until this point,  now made Cheryl feel as though she may be sick.  

you’d look gorgeous either way,  cheryl.

The same voice that had imprisoned her in a vat of drowning feelings was the same one that saved her.  ^{you’d look gorgeous either way,  cheryl.}  

She should have responded more quickly.  The red head should have reprimanded the Cooper’s kindness,  berated her,  belittled her;  ^Hell,  she should have _LEFT  once she’d dropped off the roses.  Yet there the redhead stood with no retort,  making eye contact with Betty for the first time since she’d gotten there.  Like the times she wished Jason was looking,  Cheryl held the stare.  When Betty didn’t look away,  neither did Cheryl.

Another step brought her in physical contact with the bed.  Had Cheryl been connected to an EKG,  it would be apparent that her heart rate was picking up,  but she wasn’t hooked up to anything and the Blossom knew how to serve face.  There was nothing to read unless one wanted to more thoroughly examine her body language.

Arms dropped to her sides.  One hand reached back up to tuck a red strand behind her ear,  the other gently moved Betty’s blanket to the side so it only covered one of her legs and half of the one closest to Cheryl.  Ironically coffin-filed fingernails led the way for her free hand to rest on Betty’s knee.

‘  Do you feel anything?  ’

It was the first question Cheryl had asked since arriving.  She never asked about the accident,  she never asked how Cheryl was feeling,  she never did or said most things a hospital visitor might consider proper etiquette. 

The hand moved above the knee and onto Betty’s thigh,  giving a gentle squeeze. ‘  Anything?  ’  Then the middle of her thigh and a squeeze.  ‘  Anything? ’  The questions did not repeat.  The hand moved up ^ONCE and then  ^TWICE more.  

Cheryl’s concentration left Betty’s thigh,  moving up to meet the girl’s expression to see what it might reveal.  Without even realizing it,  red nails were gently grazing back and forth in large oval movements against her  very  upper thigh.

‘  i still expect you to show up to practice,  ’  the  _REAL  head bitch said with a  _FEAUX  bitch attitude.

‘  do you know what a vixen is,  betty?  ’  if betty were going to answer,  cheryl would cut her off before her cute mouth could have time to form the sarcastic words that would follow.  cheryl answered her own rhetorical question,  ‘  YES,  it’s a female fox. But it’s also a spiteful,  quarrelsome woman.  You up  &  leaving me,  t h e   t e a m,  has made me a vixen-ous woman,  Betty Cooper.  ’

               SKREEEEEEE _{–––– down the hall, someone flatlined, footsteps pounded the floors and a woman was yelling for help. Betty should have looked away from Cheryl’s hypnotic gaze but it was like staring into a black hole, those dark eyes like coffee grounds zipping through her veins. The} chaos _{outside seemed to defy the cool calm inside the tight-walled room the two were holed up in.} 

_{Betty’s chest was tight. Every high-heeled step pulled it in} tighter_{, as though there were threads corseted between the rack of her ribs and it was Cheryl who got to play puppet-master with them, Cheryl who} controlled _{how close and fast her breathing came. Betty had to} WONDER _{if she knew. She had to. She was too purposeful, too good at everything she was doing.} 

_{Betty didn’t realize it then, and wouldn’t, until much, much later, all} alone _{in her} cell _{room. But she wasn’t thinking about the accident anymore. She wasn’t thinking about the numbness or the fatigue or the screech of tires on the cliff-side roads –– she wasn’t thinking about her} LEGS_{. And if she was, it wasn’t anything like any of the thoughts she’d had before.} 

               DO YOU FEEL ANYTHING? 

_{Her heart} slammed _{awake. She felt that. Her tongue hung} helpless _{in her mouth. She felt that. Goosebumps raised along her arms, and she definitely felt those. But she didn’t feel Cheryl’s touch ––} not at first _{–– and that was a disappointment she couldn’t explain.} 

_{Then, gradually, it came. Le déluge.} 

_{Tingles, shimmying up her thighs, trailing after wine-red nails.} 

_{With a tight throat, Betty nodded.} “ _Yes, ” _{she rasped, and a part of her wanted Cheryl to hear that hoarse timbre. Didn’t want it to escape her notice. God, she’d almost} died _{–– she didn’t want to be} SUBTLE _anymore, wasn’t it obvious_? 

_{Her brows tugged together, however.} “ _{What am I going to do, Cheryl, watch while my friends do tricks I might never be able to do again?} ” _{There it was: the self-pity she was so unfamously not known for. So far removed from the sunshine she toted around like a bumper sticker on her back ––– where was the} optimism _{now? With Cheryl, Betty didn’t have to} FAKE IT. _{It was gone, some intrinsic part of her, destroyed by one night of martyrdom. The worst part was knowing if she could ––– she} wouldn’t _{do it over again. She wouldn’t.} 

_{She hated herself for it, she did.} 

“ _{No, I don’t think you want me there.} ”